when angels deserve to die]

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Sunday, July 23, 2006

i realized i haven't been blogging. but who's going to read it anyway?

nationals ended about a week ago...all that went well was the track dinner. i guess it's back to study mode for me now. maybe i can do well academically, at least.

10:39 PM
Thursday, July 06, 2006

tomorrow is the first day of my events. hope it goes well.

8:02 PM
Sunday, June 25, 2006

SCHOOL IS STARTING TOMORROW. what a depressing thought. no more staying up late till past midnight. no more going out everyday. no more computer games (no more puzzle pirates). no more LIFE.

oh well. but i can't do anything about it so no use getting all upset over it. i don't think i can wake up tomorrow. so if i don't get to school tomorrow, you all know what happened. heh. this reminds me about the times in sec 2 when i had to go to the polyclinic to get an mc cos i woke up late. i had to feign a different sickness each time. it was so awkward having the doctor poke around my stomach and pretending to be in pain. and then when i really got sick in sec 3, the doctor refused to give me an mc cos he said my visits were too frequent. i was like, the boy who cried wolf (the girl who cried doctor).

but anyway that has nothing much to do with school starting. i know i'm going to fall asleep in class for the first few days at least, cos i've been waking up at 11 am every morning (except when i have morning trainings). i'm going to sleep after this post.

and NATIONALS ARE COMING! well i don't whether to be happy or what. i lost my shoebag (i don't think i can get them back, did i mention?), and i'm not in my best state. but then again after nationals i won't have to go for training ever again. though i don't know whether they'd still need me to take attendance. oh well. but it's 6 more trainings for the rest of my life! (: three cheers to that!

sometimes i wish i lived in a different world. like in puzzle pirates. everything's so simple and nice. nobody has to study and you go around making hearties. and you play games to work and earn your booty.

i wish i didn't have to go to school. i mean, everyone can just stay at home and having e-learning week all the time. heck, how about e-learning year?

8:50 PM
Wednesday, June 21, 2006

i still can't find my pair of spikes.
the spike nails were brand new. i just bought them from sabrina before national juniors. ): they were my lucky spikes.

9:18 PM
Monday, June 19, 2006

I GOT BROADBAND. FINALLY.

MY BLOG IS COMING ALIVE. (:

8:03 PM
Sunday, January 29, 2006

it's chinese new year!

first of all i'm sorry i haven't blogged for so long (i say it as if people are dying to read my blog haha). um i just didn't feel like i have anything to say. well there's still nothing new, actually.

i think i'm going to change my template sometime soon. and my weblog url too. just for fun. i'm kind of bored.

ok i must sound really boring. i've forgotten how to blog.

oh yeah this year chinese new year is going to be really sad. no one's going to give me red packets. ): i wish i could go to somebody's house or something. but then it'll be so weird cos i'm so obviously there for the red packets. so it's not going to work.

i have to finish my commonwealth essay. i don't want to write it. right now i'm in a realyl sleepy mode and i'm just typing whatever comes to my mind. and then also i have track attendance to do. that's irritating cos i'm not good with excel. plus i have to make amendments to the template. oh, life is terrible. ):

well i should stop complaining. it's quite fun to stay alone actually. can go anywhere anytime. haha.

oh yeah yesterday i went for reunion dinner with my guardian. it was really funny. i think she thinks i'm a little kid or something. she kept telling me the obvious, like how i must "jiao4 ren2" (how do you say that in english? call people?) when i see the elders. well but the dinner was delicious. (: my guardian's husband's parents cooked it. and then on the way back my guardian asked if i like any boys currently, and that if my mom ever talked to me about such things. it was kind of awkward, since i don't really know her. but i said no. and then she said it's ok to have boyfriends at this age, as long as you draw your personal boundaries (sounds familiar?). and she offered to take me to church today, so i meet some poly/jc guys. haha i told her no i don't plan to get a boyfriend anytime soon. at least not till after jc. i have such a funny guardian, don't i?

yay ok that wasn't too bad. but i have to go and sleep now. otherwise my brain's going to become a mess of gooey-ness.

happy chinese new year, everyone! (:

12:13 PM
Tuesday, November 01, 2005

hi hi i'm blogging. but only because lihsia tells me to and because dawn thinks im studying for next year. haha.

ok so the checking of papers are over too...everyone did so badly for chinese! haha the only people o know who got like 80% are the china scholars...my room mate got 162/200. smart-ass. oh well we all don't like her much, do we? but the highest among them is xue meng, i think. she got 171/200. smarter-ass.

i'm leaving singapore around 20th nov, to go see my parents. sigh i'll be babysitting my sister most of the time...i can just see it happening already. then i'll come back on like...20th dec? haha hopefully.

oh oh netball carn! i forgot to mention. we got first for shooting!!! yay! but we didn't play too well for the actual games...i think, we only won like, 2 or 3 games. nonetheless we all had fun. haha if there was a most enthu class award i think we'll definitely win. the 303-ers (who, very unfortunately, sat beside our very hyper class) can attest (oh i got this wrong for my english compre vocab section). and nard was...crazy. totally ruined her head-prefect image. haha.

ok see i blogged. i'm so nice huh? haha ok i shall go now because it's late and there's school tomorrow. (:

9:23 PM
Friday, October 14, 2005

today is the last day of school of my sec 3 year (last day of lessons, really, because there's still the exams and checking of papers), and i though ti might want to blog a little about it. (:

we had math and bio today. bio was as boring as ever, except that some people from moe came down and filmed us. it was quite strange, but nothing very interesting. math was quite fun i guess, we played some "special angles game"...and then at the end of the lesson, before recess, we made ms kum pose for the class photo. she didn't want to take alone so she made joey take with her. and then joey ran off just before zhiying pressed the shutter. so ms kum ended up standing alone, on one leg doing a "victory sign". haha it was quite funny. i think she's one of my favourite teachers because 1. she's a good teacher and 2. she's quite nice. but anyway next year she said she won't be teaching us cos she'll be going on maternity leave for the first few months. o but she said she'll bring her baby to class someday for us to see. heehee so cute! i wonder what she'll name her kid: polly-nomial? hahaha ok i shan't be lame.

on wednesday after cle ms siu, our form teacher, and ms kum, our cle teacher, presented us with this HUGE chocolate cake. i think it was sweet of them to do so. (: maybe ms siu will get to teach us again next year...i don't know.

ok la i shall go plan out my exam timetable now. (:

9:06 PM
Friday, September 30, 2005

heyyheyy. ok i'm blogging! (:

i'm now in 303 classroom. with jingwen. i told her i'm doing my work but shhh, i'm blogging. haha ok she'll probably see this but nevermind. i did my work already so i'm just spending a little bit of the time blogging.

there's no more training. hmmm it ended last friday...but we're going to have extra trainings just so we won't get flabby. : ok well we'll probably have slack trainings so i don't think it'll help much. and then after trainings we'll probably just gorge ourselves fats again. (:

jingwen has fallen asleep. sleepyhead. (haha ok i hope she doesn't see this until much later.)

we have eoys in like, less than 3 weeks' time! eeks. at least there isn't bio so it's not that bad. but still, we have english paper 1+2 AND lit on the first day! that is like, teh tiring. ): and i don't know how to do ss...o andandand math is scary too cos we have confusing trigo and funny circles. O.o haha ok.

anyway i have to go now. i think i'm taking too long. :p

4:03 PM
Friday, August 26, 2005

this is the story of sarah:

as a little girl she thought she was very smart. she liked to pretend to be older than she really was because it made her feel even smarter. sarah enjoyed the attention she got because it made her feel important. she thought being smart was the only thing that ever mattered. she loved to show off, and she didn't care when people thought she was proud. she hated competition, it threatened her greatly. being smart was the only thing she really had. then one day she realized maybe she never had it after all.

this is the story of ellen:

she was the prettiest little girl they've ever seen, they had told her. and so she believed them. ellen loved dressing up, she lived most of each day with her head inside her mother's closet. when she tried on her mother's clothings she mismatched every piece of them, but still she felt beautiful. it doesn't matter what clothes i wear, she remember thinking, because i'm the prettiest girl there had ever been.

this is not the story.

the past week was the worst week of my life.
you were there with me all the while, and i was on my own.

8:11 PM
Monday, August 22, 2005

Take my photo off the wall
If it just won't sing for you
'Cause all that's left has gone away
And there's nothing there for you to prove

Notice me, take my hand
Why are we strangers when
Our love is strong

Hope, dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of it has caught my eye
And roped me in

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her but
She always belonged to someone else

Oh, look what you've done, you've made a fool of everyone. Oh well, it seems like such fun, until you lose what you had won.
Everytime I try to fly, I fall without my wings, I feel so small, I guess I need you baby.
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing, I am captivated, I am vindicated, I am selfish, I am wrong, I am right, I swear I'm right, swear I knew it all along. And I am flawed, but I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself.
But I continue learning, I never meant to do those things to you, and so I have to say before I go, that I just want you to know: I've found a reason for me to change who I used to be. A reason to start over new, and the reason is you.
I drove for miles and miles and wound up at your door. I've had you so many times but somehow I want more.

give me back my point of view 'cause i just can't think for you i can hardly hear you say what should i do well you choose and everytime i see you in my dreams i see your face it's haunting me i guess i need you baby so clear like the diamond in your ring cut to mirror your intention oversized and overwhelmed the shine of which has caught my eye and rendered me i'm sorry that i hurt you it's something i must live with everyday and all the pain i put you through i wish that i could take it all away and be the one who catches all your tears i don't mind spending everyday out on your corner in the pouring rain look for the girl with the broken smile ask her if she wants to stay awhile and she will be loved

youve made a fool of everyone at night i pray that soon you will fade away so let me slip away the reason is you please dont try so hard to say goodbye

memoriesstaybuttheybecomeblurrerandblurreruntilyoucanttellwhattheyare

it doesn't matter anymore.

7:39 PM
Sunday, August 21, 2005

haha ok so i haven't blogged for more than a month! (: that's a new record! -applause- right, anyway, i'm blogging again! (:

ok i have a bio test the coming week and eng and math on week 10 and physics and ss on week 1 and therefore i think the school system is not very nice. o and they still haven't given us the chem pt, which is supposedly due on week 1 too.

this year has passed fast alright. i don't remember half of last year passing as fast. first came the nationals, which in my opinion, flashed by before i even realized it was here. and the many tests and pts, they came like the pouring rain (more like a thunderstorm, actually), and went away as quickly as they had arrived. i don't remember what happened to them exactly anyhow.

and then, poof, it the eoys. in about...two months' time. it'll probably be over before i have time to study for them. haha i'm like, a biker on the expressway. the cars pass me by so fast it seems like i'm not moving at all. but who cares anyway, i eventually end up in the same place as all of them. and those who reach there first have to wait for me before they can move on. that's the way it works! (:

ok i sound so happy and high. well i think i have a fever. ):

tomorrow's a holiday! (: that cheers me up a bit.

8:50 PM
Monday, July 11, 2005

i have qualifying for long jump tomorrow. and i have a sprained ankel so i'm very scared i can't qualify. but i will be brave and go for it anyway because everybody expects me to qualify. stress...

8:42 PM
Sunday, July 03, 2005

haha my blog looks abandoned and stagnant. so i shall blog! :D

heyy nationals are in less than two weeks! well time passes so fast. i don't think i've had enough training anyhow. well anyway i'm sec 3 this year so it's still not too bad if i can't do as well...but heyy, then again, who doesn't want to do well? i'm trying to do a 4.7m+ for this year. well i hope, really. i guess i'll need a bit of luck.

andandand! the other day i finally found a runup style that i'm comfortable with! hoorays! :D haha i feelso much less tired when i run now too! heehee.

ok i'm a bit high today, ain't i? anyway i have to go now to eat dinner with my mom and her friend. o and i haven't mentioned that my mom is back! she's staying for 6 days and then going to china. i think she'll be coming back after the china trip but i'm not sure. well.

7:15 PM
Tuesday, June 14, 2005

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Shi Qian
2. Qian
3. Qian-er (by my oh-so-wonderful-seniors)

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. xiaoqian
2. meltedicicle
3. softspoken

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Eyes
2. Smile
3. Calves

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Lips (there's scar on the left of my upper lip - i injured myself when i was 5)
2. Butt
3. Waist

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Chinese
2. Chinese
3. So totally Chinese

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Haunted Houses (as in, those in amusement parks)
2. The absence of life
3. Small and tight spaces

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Food
2. Water
3. Phone
(hell i live in a hostel what CAN i have anyway)

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. 113'03 class tee
2. FBTs
3. Undergarments

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS: (in no order of preference)
1. Avril Lavigne
2. McFly
3. Jason Mraz

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. All About You by McFly
2. You and I Both by Jason Mraz
3. Pretty Girl by Sugarcult

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Love (then?)
2. Faithfulness
3. Passion

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (in no particular order):
1. I like girls.
2. I like guys.
3. I am not bisexual.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU
1. Eyes
2. Built
3. Voice

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Drawing random stuff
2. Sleeping
3. Watching movies

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Go on a hot date
2. Sleep
3. Watch a really good movie

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. ASTRONAUT!!
2. Biotechnology Research Scientist
3. Model

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION: (in no order of preference)
1. Switzerland
2. Paris
3. Greece

THREE KID'S NAMES YOU LIKE:
1. Siobhan (read shee-von)
2. Sharon (a bit common, though)
3. Danielle

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Fall in love
2. Kiss a really hot guy
3. Have had a hundred million dollars at some point of time

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. I look like one.
2. I don't wear skirts.
3. I don't know. Some Delifrance guy once called me "Sir" when I walked in.

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A CHICK:
1. I gossip. Somewhat.
2. I like shopping.
3. Uh, I don't know. I'm a girl, does that count?

THREE PEOPLE THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
1. Emily Tan
2. Leanne!!!
3. Sabrina Ng (do you even visit my blog?)

8:15 PM
Sunday, May 29, 2005

tomorrow is track camp! and i just realized i don't have a sleeping bag. how how how!! ahh!! crap i still need to go and pack. what if i can't pack in time!! o no i am so dead. :( i am sleepy too...and i have a cold. i want to die already la. hmmm. and and and, leanne are you going? must go ok!! you don't go i'll murder you!! hmph.

ah have to go now! :( maybe i shouldn't go for camp either.

7:34 PM
Saturday, May 14, 2005

well i'm sick again. blah i think seeing doctor is irritating. you wait for so long and then you only go in for like, two minutes? how very dumb.

next week we have lit and eng test. i don't want to have eng because i can't write for nuts. well i dont' think i make any sense when i write. if teachers were less formal they'd probably write "huh?" all over my script.

and i haven't touched my physics pt at all.

blah i don't want to blog now. will some other day.

7:30 PM
Friday, May 06, 2005

today's training was terrible. so little people came. and i feel out of shape and weak. i think i was the only one who felt tired after the training. everyone else seemed quite alright. well. i guess that's what i get for not training. but this year i'm sec three, so not much chance in nationals anyway...sigh even if i was in shape i wouldn't have hoped to do well la. so there. but i feel like withdrawing from nationls this year. i really can't do it. :( next year, i'll just aim for next year la. i don't want to go for nationals.

the eois are fianlly over! yay. i feel unburdened. :) that's something to be happy about! haha...can't say i really did well, but it's over, so who cares!

yeah. today's a tired day. i need to go rest. -.-

8:04 PM
Saturday, April 23, 2005

Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results

Warmth		30%
Intellect		74%
Emotional Stability		58%
Aggressiveness		62%
Liveliness		50%
Dutifulness		46%
Social Assertiveness		70%
Sensitivity		62%
Paranoia		70%
Abstractness		82%
Introversion		70%
Anxiety		58%
Openmindedness		70%
Independence		70%
Perfectionism		54%
Tension		54%

Take Cattell 16 Factor Test (similar to 16pf)
personality tests by similarminds.com

8:42 PM

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion		56%
Stability		46%
Orderliness		43%
Empathy		30%
Interdependence		50%
Intellectual		83%
Mystical		70%
Artistic		30%
Religious		36%
Hedonism		23%
Materialism		70%
Narcissism		56%
Adventurousness		43%
Work ethic		43%
Self absorbed		43%
Conflict seeking		43%
Need to dominate		56%

Romantic		63%
Avoidant		30%
Anti-authority		76%
Wealth		56%
Dependency		36%
Change averse		56%
Cautiousness		70%
Individuality		63%
Sexuality		70%
Peter pan complex		63%
Physical security		70%
Food indulgent		30%
Histrionic		50%
Paranoia		63%
Vanity		56%
Hypersensitivity		56%
Female cliche		63%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

7:36 PM